~ATH is an insufferable language to work with.
It is a thick programming manual called "~ATH - A HANDBOOK FOR THE IMMINENTLY DECEASED." You make quite sure NOT to captchalogue it, and simply pick it up and read it. This was not the coolest thing you could have done just now. You hear some unhappy grumbling through the hole below. There are so many stupid things that happen because of this modus. It would only make sense.īut for the time being it makes your life kind of a nightmare.
Later on, you would swap your modus with your hacker friend, a guy who unlike you happens to be competent with programming. This will obviously prove to be a completely ridiculous and untenable way of managing an inventory, and lead to a great many follies.
To retrieve it, you'll need to hack the code to open the CARD VAULT left behind. You grab your trusty SICKLE with your ENCRYPTION MODUS. Like, nothing at all, really hard or anything. The best thing about it is how Troll Sandler doesn't make you want to punch anything. Ok, this one even you have a hard time defending. The thing that most people don't realize is that John Cusack is a universal constant. You space out and get caught up reading the titles of the films for about five minutes. Let's get real and get down to some major business. Ok, this sure is cozy and all, but you can't be napping all day like a chump. Every young troll enjoys the cozy embrace of such a vessel each night, and the relaxing ooze helps assuage the terrible visions of blood and carnage that plague the dark subconscious of your species.
It is your RECUPERACOON full of nourishing SOPOR SLIME. This game, for convenient reference, is a game that DOES NOT YET EXIST. Later, you will play a game with 5 other friends, and go on a big adventure with them. Your trolltag is carcinoGeneticist and you speak in a manner that is ALMOST EXCLUSIVELY ORNERY, ALL THE TIME. You have been trying out a new chat client beta called TROLLIAN, and you are NOT REALLY SURE WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT IT YET. You like to chat with some of your other troll pals, most of which drive you BATSHIT UP THE FUCKING BELFRY. You like to practice with your REALLY COOL SICKLE, but just wind up looking like KIND OF A DOOFUS BY YOURSELF IN YOUR ROOM. When you mature, you aspire to join the ranks of the most lethal members of your society, the THRESHECUTIONERS. Your programs invariably damage the machines on which they are executed, which is just as well, since you like to believe you specialize in COMPUTER VIRUSES. You like to program computers, but you are NOTORIOUSLY PRETTY AWFUL AT IT. You should really be EMBARRASSED for liking this DREADFUL CINEMA, but for some reason you are not. You have a passion for RIDICULOUSLY TERRIBLE ROMANTIC MOVIES AND ROMCOMS. It is an anniversary, if anything, to lament the faults of your existence, of which there are assuredly plenty.Įqually plenty, and somewhat related to that topic, are your INTERESTS. As was previously mentioned, it is your WRIGGLING DAY, which is barely even worth mentioning. He thinks you should cram that sobering understanding in your chitinous windhole, and tamp it down hard with your ugly stupid looking cartilage nub. He thinks that if you think that we have time to drag out every little gag and expected pattern along the way, you've got another thing coming. This guy has a lot of troll pals and their adventures are going to be quite extensive and convoluted, to an even greater degree than one perhaps may be accustomed. You enter something predictably derogatory and this guy gets fed up by your shenanigans in record time. What will the name of this young troll be? Six Alternian solar sweeps, for convenient reference, is equivalent to thirteen Earth years.Įarth, also for convenient reference, is a planet that does not yet exist. Though it was six solar sweeps ago he was given life, it is only today he will be given a name! It just so happens that today, the 12th bilunar perigee of the 6th dark season's equinox, is the day of this young troll's larval awakening, also known as his wriggling day. This young troll stands in his respiteblock. Somewhere on this planet, there is a young troll. In fact, as it happens, your guess is precisely correct. Really hilarious.īut let's get real here. Let your browser do all the work!!! If your text is in one of the commands or captions, it'll show up here.Įlsewhere in paradox space, we examine another planet, forgotten by time.īut we will strive to remember. To search for something, hit Ctrl+F (or Apple+F) and type what you're looking for. Hey, welcome to the super cool low-tech search page!